Author Topic: Dating or not dating.  (Read 44395 times)

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Offline NikF

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Dating or not dating.
« on: August 05, 2016, 05:43:46 AM »
There a tl;dr at the end of this post.

Dating seems the same to me no matter what age I am or what the Internet tells me has changed about it.

 *edit*
If you read this first post when the thread was started you might remember it spoke of my relationship with Toots McG ending, and how despite not being ready to date yet I saw and approached and got the number of a nice dancer. The dancer and I ended up dating for a while, but for a number of reasons I allowed it to fade out. Since then she's got in touch with me again. And to cut an already long story short, she will be posting (or at least lurking) here in the forum due to her knowledge of ballet music and her career dancing to it as part of a professional ballet company. So frankly, I'm removing all the incriminating evidence that was originally contained in this first post. ;D Everything else can stay, because she needs to see and know me 'warts and all" and that really, I regret none of it.  :laugh:  8)


*end of edit*



tl;dr I met a nice dancer lady as a result of me having a big mouth.
« Last Edit: January 21, 2017, 03:39:23 PM by NikF »
What doesn't kill you always makes you stronger - unless you were too weak to begin with, of course. Fact.

Offline Mirror Image

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Re: Dating or not dating.
« Reply #1 on: August 05, 2016, 02:36:49 PM »
Well, I'm proud for you and I hope things go well with this blonde haired woman who seems cool. I have a bit of a dilemma myself (I really shouldn't call it a dilemma), but the PA (Physician's Assistant) at the urology office I've been frequenting these past few months has me quite smitten. She's not my doctor, but she did do a pre-op with me last week and this was my first encounter with her. I was utterly charmed. No ring on her finger and I was hoping to see her today as I needed my doctor to release me so I can start back work, but to no avail I didn't see her. Anyway, she's my type and I did a bit of Facebook stalking (I know I'm a bad boy) and it turns out she's a classical fan. Also, let's say I ask her out and she says "yes," I wonder if this would violate the whole doctor/patient thing? I suppose it wouldn't since I'm not her patient. I really hope I get to see her again and I'd love for her to accompany to see the Atlanta Symphony Orchestra perform. If I can get something happening by September-October, I'll be good as statistically these are the months I do the best in as far as scoring dates. Keeping my fingers crossed.
« Last Edit: August 05, 2016, 02:40:05 PM by Mirror Image »
"Music must be beautiful, or it wouldn’t be worth the effort” - Bohuslav Martinů

Offline NikF

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Re: Dating or not dating.
« Reply #2 on: August 06, 2016, 03:13:09 AM »
Any idea why you have more success in getting dates within those months? In any case, if/when you ask her out I hope it works out for you.

I'm kind of reticent to ask someone out when they're at work. I only ever do so when I'm sure they've an interest in me other than any interest they're required to show that's part of their job description, although it's impossible to always be 100% certain about that. Still, over the years I've managed to call it right and then get the number of someone who has been working.
e: but like I said, I have a big mouth.  ;D
« Last Edit: August 06, 2016, 03:15:51 AM by NikF »
What doesn't kill you always makes you stronger - unless you were too weak to begin with, of course. Fact.

Offline Sergeant Rock

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Re: Dating or not dating.
« Reply #3 on: August 06, 2016, 03:59:41 AM »
My girlfriend and I parted in mid-June

Toots is gone? Sorry to hear that...well, I suppose I shouldn't offer condolence since I don't know the circumstances. Maybe you're happy about the break-up. In any case I have nothing to offer about the current dating scene. I last asked a women out 41 years ago. I'm a bit rusty. I can confirm, though, that having a "big mouth" is essential in this pursuit. Always helped me  ;D

Sarge
the phone rings and somebody says,
"hey, they made a movie about
Mahler, you ought to go see it.
he was as f*cked-up as you are."
                               --Charles Bukowski, "Mahler"

Offline NikF

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Re: Dating or not dating.
« Reply #4 on: August 06, 2016, 04:42:38 AM »
Toots is gone? Sorry to hear that...well, I suppose I shouldn't offer condolence since I don't know the circumstances. Maybe you're happy about the break-up. In any case I have nothing to offer about the current dating scene. I last asked a women out 41 years ago. I'm a bit rusty. I can confirm, though, that having a "big mouth" is essential in this pursuit. Always helped me  ;D

Sarge

Thanks, Sarge. Yeah, we split up. It was as friendly and amicable as could be hoped for. But it was still awful, you know?
In the end it was the age difference. We'd agreed that when she finished her studies (she's now Toots McGams LLB, LLM   :D ) we'd look again at the idea of starting a family. I feel too old to be a father. But I don't want to stop her being a mother. She's a good person.
As far as I know she's moving to Denmark full time and has already signed with a modelling agency there.

Quote
I can confirm, though, that having a "big mouth" is essential in this pursuit. Always helped me  ;D

Sarge

 I get the impression you know where it's at. ;D
What doesn't kill you always makes you stronger - unless you were too weak to begin with, of course. Fact.

Offline Mirror Image

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Re: Dating or not dating.
« Reply #5 on: August 06, 2016, 06:00:13 AM »
Any idea why you have more success in getting dates within those months? In any case, if/when you ask her out I hope it works out for you.

I'm kind of reticent to ask someone out when they're at work. I only ever do so when I'm sure they've an interest in me other than any interest they're required to show that's part of their job description, although it's impossible to always be 100% certain about that. Still, over the years I've managed to call it right and then get the number of someone who has been working.
e: but like I said, I have a big mouth.  ;D

Thanks, NikF. I couldn't tell you why I have more success in September and October. I suppose the cooling down ignites something more fiery inside of me? :) I just love the transition from summer to winter and that's why I suppose I love the feel of autumn. It's like you know you have find someone quick before winter gets so you'll have someone to snuggle up with. ;D About your big mouth, this could be a blessing and a curse at the same time. I could see how it could get you into a heated argument, but, at the same time, it also can score you a date. I should really take up your example. Good luck with this blonde haired woman. I hope it works out for you and you find someone that you can grow with.
« Last Edit: August 06, 2016, 06:13:52 AM by Mirror Image »
"Music must be beautiful, or it wouldn’t be worth the effort” - Bohuslav Martinů

Offline The new erato

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Re: Dating or not dating.
« Reply #6 on: August 06, 2016, 06:16:28 AM »
Anything to do with less sweating in fall? :-\

Offline Mirror Image

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Re: Dating or not dating.
« Reply #7 on: August 06, 2016, 06:23:41 AM »
Anything to do with less sweating in fall? :-\

Could very well be the case. Our autumns and winters here are relatively mild compared to the arctic blasts they get from up north, but I do like the cool temperatures. My ideal temperature is 7℃ with just a little wind chill. Just cool enough to put on a fleece jacket.
« Last Edit: August 06, 2016, 06:26:39 AM by Mirror Image »
"Music must be beautiful, or it wouldn’t be worth the effort” - Bohuslav Martinů

Offline NikF

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Re: Dating or not dating.
« Reply #8 on: August 06, 2016, 07:06:41 AM »
I couldn't tell you why I have more success in September and October. I suppose the cooling down ignites something more fiery inside of me? :) I just love the transition from summer to winter and that's why I suppose I love the feel of autumn. It's like you know you have find someone quick before winter gets so you'll have someone to snuggle up with ;D

Funny you should say that about autumn, because one way or another I'm thinking this will be my first year of fully listening to (and having more appreciation for) autumnal Brahms. Then, as it gets colder perhaps I'll move on to Martinu. Finally for Xmas, it'll be shared between Tchaikovsky and Prokofiev. ;D

As for my big mouth, I don't know how Sarge got his (or if he was simply born with it  ;D ) but mine started when I was about 16. My boss at the studio I worked in used to ask if I'd finished all I had to do for the day and if I said yes he'd hand me a camera and say "40 exposures (we rolled our own) go stand outside and photograph people". My first year or so went like this -

*Nervously approaches a passerby and mumbles*
"Uh...'scuse me but uh...my boss sent me down here because he's a photographer up there *point to studio* and er...I'm learning to be a photographer and um...he said I've to take photos of people who I don't know and so can I take your photo please but it's okay if you don't want me to  :-["

My big mouth develops and one year later -
*Sings to self and approaches a passerby - most often a woman and says*
"Hello. My name's Nik and I'm a photographer - and you look great. So I'd like to take your photo right now. How you feel about that?"
 ;D
Then again, while stopping short of being that guy who talks to everyone he passes and is always happy - too happy - I've often a word for people I meet. If an old lady and her dog are walking through the park I say hello to them both, individually. And it's cool if a pretty girl walks past and you can say "That's a lovely colour" sincerely about something she's wearing, without hitting on her. Even a guy walking past in a suit gets a nod that says "You look sharp".
And the best thing is, when people know you're genuine then more often than not it comes back at you as a smile or the person walking a little taller or something. It's cool.
e: yeah, so get a big mouth. :)
« Last Edit: August 06, 2016, 07:10:31 AM by NikF »
What doesn't kill you always makes you stronger - unless you were too weak to begin with, of course. Fact.

Offline NikF

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Re: Dating or not dating.
« Reply #9 on: August 12, 2016, 06:03:07 AM »
I've downloaded and installed the Tinder app. It requires a Facebook page and so I started a new one. This could be interesting.
What doesn't kill you always makes you stronger - unless you were too weak to begin with, of course. Fact.

Offline (poco) Sforzando

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Re: Dating or not dating.
« Reply #10 on: August 12, 2016, 06:49:54 AM »
Well, I'm proud for you and I hope things go well with this blonde haired woman who seems cool. I have a bit of a dilemma myself (I really shouldn't call it a dilemma), but the PA (Physician's Assistant) at the urology office I've been frequenting these past few months has me quite smitten. She's not my doctor, but she did do a pre-op with me last week and this was my first encounter with her.

If nothing else, she will be aware of your assets.
"I don't know what sforzando means, though it clearly means something."

Offline Mirror Image

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Re: Dating or not dating.
« Reply #11 on: August 12, 2016, 06:57:52 AM »
If nothing else, she will be aware of your assets.

;D Well, she actually didn't see anything. The urologist I frequent, however, knows the story there. ;)
"Music must be beautiful, or it wouldn’t be worth the effort” - Bohuslav Martinů

Offline Brian

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Re: Dating or not dating.
« Reply #12 on: August 12, 2016, 07:27:49 AM »
If I can get something happening by September-October, I'll be good as statistically these are the months I do the best in as far as scoring dates. Keeping my fingers crossed.
I couldn't tell you why I have more success in September and October. I suppose the cooling down ignites something more fiery inside of me? :) I just love the transition from summer to winter and that's why I suppose I love the feel of autumn. It's like you know you have find someone quick before winter gets so you'll have someone to snuggle up with. ;D
All due respect - I laughed out loud at these posts. There's just something faintly ridiculous about this idea, I guess? I've started dating people in, uh, June, June, April, and May, so ... does that mean spring is my thing? Never once have I thought of it that way before. And this is in Texas where it's so darn hot that even sitting next to someone gets unbearable. Thank goodness for air-conditioning.

I've downloaded and installed the Tinder app. It requires a Facebook page and so I started a new one. This could be interesting.

Wednesday I got together with a couple good friends. One of us is single and on Tinder, and he generously let the other two of us do the swiping for him. He has a couple of dates in the next week with girls who look cool, but he is gonna get in trouble soon, because his main photo is him cuddling a friend's dog, and all the girls on Tinder think it's his dog. False advertising...

If nothing else, she will be aware of your assets.

This thread is gonna be so great.

-

Anyway, I have been dating someone for a month and a half and it's been going pretty well. She has a PhD and a house with a fig tree, and we're talking about getting Dallas Symphony season tickets together. No complaints!

Offline Brian

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Re: Dating or not dating.
« Reply #13 on: August 12, 2016, 07:32:57 AM »
Circling back around to ask Mirror Image: surely you're not delaying to ask her out until you reach Sept/Oct? Surely you'll act at the next good opportunity? Delaying really increases the chances something will go amiss. I mean, timing is kind of on my mind right now, because my girlfriend lived in my apartment building for two years and I only got to ask her out literally the day she moved out.
« Last Edit: August 12, 2016, 07:34:38 AM by Brian »

Offline (poco) Sforzando

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Re: Dating or not dating.
« Reply #14 on: August 12, 2016, 11:01:50 AM »
Anyway, I have been dating someone for a month and a half and it's been going pretty well. She has a PhD and a house with a fig tree . . . .

Sounds good. It's not every day you get a fig tree.
"I don't know what sforzando means, though it clearly means something."

Offline Ken B

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Re: Dating or not dating.
« Reply #15 on: August 12, 2016, 11:10:52 AM »
;D Well, she actually didn't see anything. The urologist I frequent, however, knows the story there. ;)

She's heard the rumors.
Give a man a fire and he is warm for a day. Set a man on fire and he is warm for life.

Offline Brian

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Re: Dating or not dating.
« Reply #16 on: August 12, 2016, 11:34:48 AM »
Sounds good. It's not every day you get a fig tree.
If you have a fig tree, though, it is every day that you get 14+ ounces of figs. She once picked 7 pounds in 5 days.

Offline (poco) Sforzando

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Re: Dating or not dating.
« Reply #17 on: August 12, 2016, 11:39:10 AM »
If you have a fig tree, though, it is every day that you get 14+ ounces of figs. She once picked 7 pounds in 5 days.

Then please share some with your friends, as well as the leaves in case they have any nude statues or paintings lying about.
"I don't know what sforzando means, though it clearly means something."

Online Scarpia

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Re: Dating or not dating.
« Reply #18 on: August 12, 2016, 11:40:57 AM »
Sounds good. It's not every day you get a fig tree.

Better to date a girl who has a raspberry bush.
« Last Edit: August 12, 2016, 12:13:48 PM by Scarpia »

Offline (poco) Sforzando

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Re: Dating or not dating.
« Reply #19 on: August 12, 2016, 12:02:30 PM »
Better to date a girl who has a raspberry bush.

(I swear I typed that before it occurred to me that it could be interpreted more than one way.)
 :o

Should have left it as it was, then; much more witty. Never apologize for your best jokes.
"I don't know what sforzando means, though it clearly means something."

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