Missing Members

[Marc]

[...]

[...]

A childhood hero of mine.

[NikF4]

I'm not hanging around so some creepy old coward can twist my words to further their cause -



Anyway, enough of all this crap. There are a few people I speak with off site already, but this morning I received a couple of sincere messages and it'll be my pleasure to chat with those too.

And I don't do the whole 'flounce off and then sneak back later thing.' I won't even lurk to read any replies to this message.

Look after yourselves and no matter how good the music is remember to go outside and smell the real flowers once in a while.

[Harry]

I'm not hanging around so some creepy old coward can twist my words to further their cause -



Anyway, enough of all this crap. There are a few people I speak with off site already, but this morning I received a couple of sincere messages and it'll be my pleasure to chat with those too.

And I don't do the whole 'flounce off and then sneak back later thing.' I won't even lurk to read any replies to this message.

Look after yourselves and no matter how good the music is remember to go outside and smell the real flowers once in a while.

I for one am heartily sorry that NikF4, also deleted his account.  I valued his contribution, and am quite sad he is gone. I respected him, and still do.

[Brian]

I for one am heartily sorry that NikF4, also deleted his account.  I valued his contribution, and am quite sad he is gone. I respected him, and still do.

Yup, I liked Nik and his adventures and his live concert diary. But this episode was just bizarre. It is of course clear that "I bet nobody would get in a boxing ring with me" was NOT a threat, just as I personally bet nobody here could try to eat more cookies than me  But calling Mike all the things he just called him, zoinks.

I suspect Nik will wake up with some remorse because he seems like a good dude, but ... 

[Ken B]

I for one am heartily sorry that NikF4, also deleted his account.  I valued his contribution, and am quite sad he is gone. I respected him, and still do.

After his recent spate of inchoate, vitriolic and puerile abuse I must demur. He had become like a belligerent drunk at a soccer game.

[Marc]

Yup, I liked Nik and his adventures and his live concert diary. But this episode was just bizarre. It is of course clear that "I bet nobody would get in a boxing ring with me" was NOT a threat, just as I personally bet nobody here could try to eat more cookies than me  But calling Mike all the things he just called him, zoinks.

I suspect Nik will wake up with some remorse because he seems like a good dude, but ... 

It is a true pity, indeed.
His final advice "[...] go outside and smell the real flowers once in a while" was a good one. It might even have worked with him in this particular matter. Most certainly combined with his Personal Text, which was, iirc, "Time and patience."

I admit I'm a bit baffled and also feeling sad about what has been happening here the last 2 or 3 days. And I'm not even a heavy regular anymore.

[Que]

I hope I'm not the only one tired of witnessing the same stuff over and over again? 

It's a classic chain of events:
1) poster A annoys the hell out of poster B (mind that there is a possibility that poster A is actually really annoying)
2) Poster B goes off the rails.
3) Poster A leaves and poster B is moderated.
4) Poster B takes it up a few notches, but now conveniently targets the moderator.
5) Poster B leaves.

Really, I don't care anymore...

Anyone who is angry and takes it out on someone here, can take a hike... Thank you very much...

Q

[JBS]

I for one am heartily sorry that NikF4, also deleted his account.  I valued his contribution, and am quite sad he is gone. I respected him, and still do.

I too, and would be very glad if one of those who do have contact with him off forum let him know that I would be glad to keep in touch with him.

[Harry]

I too, and would be very glad if one of those who do have contact with him off forum let him know that I would be glad to keep in touch with him.

I will do that for you!

[Pat B]

I hope I'm not the only one tired of witnessing the same stuff over and over again? 

It's a classic chain of events:
1) poster A annoys the hell out of poster B (mind that there is a possibility that poster A is actually really annoying)
2) Poster B goes off the rails.
3) Poster A leaves and poster B is moderated.
4) Poster B takes it up a few notches, but now conveniently targets the moderator.
5) Poster B leaves.

Really, I don't care anymore...

Anyone who is angry and takes it out on someone here, can take a hike... Thank you very much...

Ideally, the original disagreement was along the lines of "you interpret the phrase 'emotional content' slightly differently than I do."

[JBS]

I will do that for you!

Thank you!

[Karl Henning]

I too, and would be very glad if one of those who do have contact with him off forum let him know that I would be glad to keep in touch with him.

Likewise,please.

[vandermolen]

I hope I'm not the only one tired of witnessing the same stuff over and over again? 

It's a classic chain of events:
1) poster A annoys the hell out of poster B (mind that there is a possibility that poster A is actually really annoying)
2) Poster B goes off the rails.
3) Poster A leaves and poster B is moderated.
4) Poster B takes it up a few notches, but now conveniently targets the moderator.
5) Poster B leaves.

Really, I don't care anymore...

Anyone who is angry and takes it out on someone here, can take a hike... Thank you very much...

Q

I've had very nice exchanges with both parties, especially MI (over many years) and it is very sad that this has happened. The level of vitriol poured over MI surprised and disheartened me. I'm no saint myself but life is too short for all this.

[aligreto]

I've had very nice exchanges with both parties, especially MI (over many years) and it is very sad that this has happened. The level of vitriol poured over MI surprised and disheartened me. I'm no saint myself but life is too short for all this.

+1

[Ken B]

I've had very nice exchanges with both parties, especially MI (over many years) and it is very sad that this has happened. The level of vitriol poured over MI surprised and disheartened me. I'm no saint myself but life is too short for all this.

It did not alas surprise me because it wasn't the first example from NikF4. And it wasn't the last or, from what Knight says, even the worst. I hope Brian is right and that he regrets his behavior, but I won't hold my breath.

I do hope John returns.

[Karl Henning]

+1

+1

[Que]

I've had very nice exchanges with both parties, especially MI (over many years) and it is very sad that this has happened. The level of vitriol poured over MI surprised and disheartened me. I'm no saint myself but life is too short for all this.

I don't understand these sudden outbursts of verbal aggression... some of us have issues, clearly... 

I'm pretty sure MI will be back at some moment BTW.

Q

[JBS]

I don't understand these sudden outbursts of verbal agression... some of us have issues, clearly... 

I'm pretty sure MI will be back at some moment BTW.

Q

I am under the impression that Nik had a much rougher upbringing than a number of us, and a consequent willingness to put aside burgher proprieties when he thought they were harmful. And also possibly a feeling of being something of an outsider here. I must also confess that while I didn't share Nik's vehemence,  John (MI) could often post comments that I found tiresome, annoying, even provoking.

But I consider both my friends, and hope they return to peaceful co-existence.

At the very least I have always found their contributions to far outweigh their "sins".

[Que]

I am under the impression that Nik had a much rougher upbringing than a number of us, and a consequent willingness to put aside burgher proprieties when he thought they were harmful.

During my tenure as a moderator I've encountered "gentlemen" of supposedly perfect pedigree foaming at the mouth and turning to vicious verbal abuse, just because they don't like to be told they were out of line. Crossing the line is always perfectly justified, it's the other guy's fault, others have done much worse, they are being picked on and moderation is biased and arbitrary as a rule and conducted by very, very bad people (to put it euphemistically).

So no, I don't buy into that argument. I have encountered many from humble backgrounds and rough surroundings that are among the kindest and most genteel people I've ever met. Contrary to middle/upper class beliefs, pedigree is hugely overrated IMO.

Fortunately there are some that will just admit that they got carried away a bit, and good heartedly move on. Real (gentle)men... I mean, we all have our weak moments of bad judgment, and we all are bound to annoy someone at some moment in time - I'm sure I do.... But dealing with that in a mature way separates the good from the bad.

We can call ourselves lucky that the forum currently needs a minimum of moderating. For some it is too little, for some any moderating is too much.It's a hard call. Most of the time, intervening will make matters worse. But sometimes things have to get worse, before they get better.

At the very least I have always found their contributions to far outweigh their "sins".

There are different degrees of crossing the line. I personally don't see how there is any going back from threatening someone and calling him a pedophile.

Q

[Florestan]

Speaking as someone who in the past have been involved in bitter conflict with the mods, all  but one, I can attest to their being actually moderate, open to criticism, and, especially in my case, forgiving and forgetful with the culprit who sincerely acknowledges his shortcomings and faults and admits to temporarily having lost his temper / minds. I've been a GMG members for more than 10 years, I think, and as far as I can remember the only member banned during all this time was the one who pretty much anybody else agreed he was obnoxious, annoying and insulting. Is there another internet board, I wonder, where during 10 full years there was only 1 (one) banned member? Generally, the most extreme measure the mods are likely to take is to temporarily lock a thread. Now, I am opposed to that in principle because in my view free speech is sacrosanct, and in some cases I protested loudly against such measures --- but I know form personal experience that sometimes taking a pause from heated debate can work wonders for all parties involved.

Bottom line, I'd like to express my honest opinion that GMG is generally a place where any member can freely express his / her opinion without any fear they'll be censored, except in such extreme cases as insulting another member in the grossest manner possible. No, wait, now that I think of it there was one quite active GMG member who posted sensible thoughts about music and wild rants about politics and who, having been apparently put on a moderating system for the latter, chose to quit this board for good. If you ask me, this is a clear example of censorship driving away a member. But apart from this isolated case, my impression is that GMG is --- again --- THE freest internet board I've ever been a member of.

And I have no intention to leave so you folks, and you mods, will have to put up with me and my ideas for any foreseeable future.