The unimportant news thread

Started by Lethevich, March 05, 2008, 07:14:50 AM

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drogulus


     

     We can do better.

     

     

     
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Florestan

Every kind of music is good, except the boring kind. — Rossini

LKB

Quote from: drogulus on December 23, 2019, 09:32:31 AM
     

     We can do better.

     

If you're gonna have Mothra, you should squeeze the tiny twins in there too. They can adjudicate the fight and sing to the big bug between rounds.

;D,

LKB
Mit Flügeln, die ich mir errungen...

greg

I've been checking several times a day for the last two weeks to see when the Final Fantasy 7 Remake demo is launching on PS4.

So one day a few days ago, there was an article on Gamespot mentioning that it wouldn't be released until the actual release date of the full game (March 3rd)- this information was incorrect.

What happened next was several game news sites writing that March 3rd was the release date. Then, most of them retracted/edited the article to correct the mistake (but at that point people may or may not see the article any more).

Seems fake news is so bad that it even extends to the video game world.  ??? ::)
Wagie wagie get back in the cagie

SimonNZ

Why is Gwyneth Paltrow selling a candle that smells like her vagina?
Gwyneth has made a candle called This Smells Like My Vagina for her website, Goop. And, of course, it has sold out


"Truly, has any vagina ever been as fruitful as Gwyneth Paltrow's? It has birthed discussions of vaginal steaming, vaginal jade eggs, $15,000 dildos, something called "sex dust" and a photo of Gwyneth standing in a giant vagina to advertise some inevitable Netflix documentary/reality TV series crossover. Because Gwyneth no longer has just her head up her vagina; she has crawled all the way inside. I am torn between suggesting this is a very advanced yoga position accessible only to those who have endless free time to practise, and pointing out this is The Human Centipede, but for extreme narcissists. Let's go with both.

So Gwyneth has made a candle called This Smells Like My Vagina because, well, of course she has. It is priced at a comparatively bargain £58, which was pretty much what the sex dust cost, which makes me think Gwyneth is underpricing her vagina, really, if she is just selling it for the price of a load of old dust. And I say "was what the sex dust cost" because the sex dust, like the vagina candle, sold out.

Yes, Gwyneth's vagina has been good to us, but it has primarily been good to her. Well, in the main. As all of us ladies know, sometimes there can be problems in that department, and while most of us sort ours out with a dose of Canesten, Gwyneth's vagina problem, in classic Gwyneth fashion, ended up costing her $145,000 (£110,000). This was in 2018 when her near-notorious wellness company, Goop, was fined under California's civil penalties laws for making what was described as "unsubstantiated" marketing claims about the aforementioned jade egg. It turns out, incredibly, that shoving a random object up your vagina won't "balance hormones, regulate menstrual cycles, prevent uterine prolapse and increase bladder control".

In fact, the gynaecologist Dr Jen Gunter, in an open letter to Gwyneth that went as viral as an unwashed jade egg, suggested that it might cause toxic shock syndrome. Despite that, it is still for sale on goop.com, for a steal at a mere £60, although after that legal unpleasantness, the only words next to it on the site are: "Eggs are pre-drilled for string add-on, we recommend using unwaxed dental floss." The mind does truly boggle.

Whole religions have been founded trying to answer the big questions: what is the meaning of life? What is reality? How can we cope with the concept of mortality? Goop is a quasi-religion in itself, from its messianic head figure, its deluded self-belief, its ludicrous claims and its overflowing bank account accrued from the desperate and vulnerable, estimated to exceed $250m. It has answered perhaps the greatest question of all: what does Gwyneth's vagina smell like? According to the candle, it is a "funny, gorgeous, sexy and beautifully unexpected scent", a mix of "geranium, citrusy bergamot, and cedar absolutes juxtaposed with damask rose and ambrette seed". To which one can only say: boy, Gwyneth sure does spend a lot of time up there to have picked up on all that. I've read entire wine menus with fewer descriptive references.

But we must tread carefully here because Gwyneth does not like people questioning her vagina. In 2017, pre-legal case, in response to Dr Gunter's repeated criticisms, Goop posted a gorgeously huffy reply, which Gwyneth tweeted, with the comment: "When they go low, we go high." Who knew flogging vaginal eggs was taking the high road? Goop's "contributing doctors" described Dr Gunter as "strangely confident" (to which Dr Gunter replied: "I am appropriately confident") and insisted they are "empowering women" by "questioning the status quo". The status quo being, I guess, vaginas without egg-shaped rocks stuck up inside them. Thank God that status has been quo-ed. Those doctors, by the way, seem to have been strangely silent, post-legal case. No doubt so as to empower women better.

Still, Goop is worth more than a quarter of a billion dollars, largely because of Gwyneth talking about her vagina, so no wonder she has a smile on her face (or maybe that's just the vaginal egg). So, light that candle, breathe deep and accept the facts: this is Gwyneth's vagina. And the rest of us just live in it."

greg

JonTron made a video about that. He literally dresses up as a snake oil salesman outside her Goop store and tries to sell it.  :D
Wagie wagie get back in the cagie

ritter

Mankind  has reached a point where it truly deserves to be wiped out by a meteorite... ::)

greg

Quote from: ritter on January 13, 2020, 01:33:29 PM
Mankind  has reached a point where it truly deserves to be wiped out by a meteorite... ::)
Nah. That should have happened thousands of years ago.
Wagie wagie get back in the cagie

SimonNZ

Also: if your hoo-ha smells like something marketable you should really see a doctor.

LKB

Quote from: SimonNZ on January 13, 2020, 02:29:01 PM
Also: if your hoo-ha smells like something marketable you should really see a doctor.

Or a pimp...

https://youtu.be/JOXfw-TtJj8

Those were the days,

LKB

Mit Flügeln, die ich mir errungen...

SimonNZ

Man requests sword fight with ex-wife and lawyer to settle legal dispute

"A Kansas man has asked an Iowa judge to let him engage in a sword fight with his ex-wife and her attorney in a trial by combat that will settle their ongoing legal dispute.

David Ostrom, 40, of Paola, Kansas, said in a 3 January court filing that his former wife, Bridgette Ostrom, 38, of Harlan, Iowa, and her attorney, Matthew Hudson, had "destroyed (him) legally".

The judge had the power to let the parties "resolve our disputes on the field of battle, legally," David Ostrom said, adding in his filing that trial by combat "has never been explicitly banned or restricted as a right in these United States".

He also asked the judge for 12 weeks' time so he could secure Japanese samurai swords.

The Ostroms have been embroiled in disputes over custody and visitation issues and property tax payments."

JBS

#3551
Quote from: SimonNZ on January 14, 2020, 02:46:14 PM
Man requests sword fight with ex-wife and lawyer to settle legal dispute

"A Kansas man has asked an Iowa judge to let him engage in a sword fight with his ex-wife and her attorney in a trial by combat that will settle their ongoing legal dispute.

David Ostrom, 40, of Paola, Kansas, said in a 3 January court filing that his former wife, Bridgette Ostrom, 38, of Harlan, Iowa, and her attorney, Matthew Hudson, had "destroyed (him) legally".

The judge had the power to let the parties "resolve our disputes on the field of battle, legally," David Ostrom said, adding in his filing that trial by combat "has never been explicitly banned or restricted as a right in these United States".

He also asked the judge for 12 weeks' time so he could secure Japanese samurai swords.

The Ostroms have been embroiled in disputes over custody and visitation issues and property tax payments."

The UK didn't abolish trial of combat until about 1825 (I'd have to look up the date),* and did so only when someone tried to use it in their own case, and thereby got everyone to notice it was still on the books.  So he might be right about it never being abolished in the US. But it was used only in Writs of Right and similar medieval forms, and Appeals of Felony, all of which have been abolished in the US (and UK, of course).   If he wants to go according to the laws appropriate to the era of Trial by Combat, there was no such thing as divorce and  anything in the way of marital disputes was handled by courts of canon law under the authority of the local bishop.

And the parties could in trial by combat hire a champion to fight for them, so perhaps Ms. Ostrom can hire an actual samurai to use that samurai sword on her behalf.

*brief dip into the Web says the case occurred in 1818, abolition was in 1819, and the last confirmed case in which itbwas used was 1597, in Scotland.

Hollywood Beach Broadwalk

pjme

Quote from: SimonNZ on January 13, 2020, 02:29:01 PM
Also: if your hoo-ha smells like something marketable you should really see a doctor.

It is all quite silly, weird and awkward - exactly.
But please: a vagina is just that, not a hoo-ha.

SimonNZ

Well it's not a term id use except in the silliest of circumstances.

drogulus

Quote from: ritter on January 13, 2020, 01:33:29 PM
Mankind  has reached a point where it truly deserves to be wiped out by a meteorite... ::)

     Perhaps, though I don't think any meteorite deserves to do it.
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greg

Man Gets Assaulted By Woman, Has Evidence, University Sides With Woman And Finds Him Guilty

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SRUIxXdUQeE


Be a good boy. Believe all women.  :)
Wagie wagie get back in the cagie

SimonNZ

Said the guy who believes the Daily Caller as filtered through a YT bobble head.

The story might be broadly true, but I just read the DC  piece and its got big red warning lights all the way through it suggesting tailoring the story to a wider anti-MeToo agenda. They also fail to show how he was "assaulted". I'd be interested in reading the story through a more credible source, preferably one that details the university's  thinking and procedure, rather than just applying set assumptions.

But be a good boy. Believe all ranting right wing bobble heads.

greg

Quote from: SimonNZ on January 24, 2020, 05:43:41 PM
Said the guy who believes the Daily Caller as filtered through a YT bobble head.

The story might be broadly true, but I just read the DC  piece and its got big red warning lights all the way through it suggesting tailoring the story to a wider anti-MeToo agenda. They also fail to show how he was "assaulted". I'd be interested in reading the story through a more credible source, preferably one that details the university's  thinking and procedure, rather than just applying set assumptions.
"Assaulted" is a stretch and wasn't titled the best way.

He reviews news stories from sites of any political side, run through the newsguard filter. Many of the sites he gets news stories from he doesn't even like or support.

The point is to show the dangers of the "Believe all women" slogan. It's very bad for both men and women because with this attitude men don't get to defend themselves from false accusations, and when lying about such a thing rewards women, it makes genuine claims less believable.

Which shouldn't have to be said since we don't live in the stone age any more...

Quote from: SimonNZ on January 24, 2020, 05:43:41 PM
But be a good boy. Believe all ranting right wing bobble heads.
Tim is a liberal.
I like how often people on the left make assumptions that anyone who criticizes anything on the left is automatically on the right (an assumption I've seen made too many times to count, which is a tame label for what normally happens).
Wagie wagie get back in the cagie

greg

Ok, I found this story pretty funny.

Antifa protesting a trash cleanup.  ;D

They are saying that the other people are cleaning up trash in the cities to make "brown people look dirty."

The mask slips...  ;D

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FrFFAlEeU-0
Wagie wagie get back in the cagie