I've just come to a realisation; that I am a failure. I haven't achieved anything in my wretched life. I try to give birth to profound, functional art, and when I look at it in the morning it's a sentimental piece of garbage. I say I want to create art to help people, and yet I fail to do so. I have failed to pull a young girl out of the mud and make her into a better person, introduce her to the profound, I'm not saying I would make a great teacher, but could that little knowledge that possesses me be enough to convert a young girl from her banality to profundity? I have even failed to embrace profundity myself. I see beauty all the time, but I can never grasp it: The girl I saw on the train, or a woman I saw whom as Balzac would say was one of those that had a sort of intellectual beauty, that makes her look much more beautiful at thirty of forty than she was perhaps at fifteen. Ahh, yes, I'm an Apollonian drunkard who just turned Dionysian and can't deal with it.
All I yearn for now is to return to the womb. I want a woman to hold me in her arms, to kiss me and treat me tenderly, to remind of me those sweet days when I was in my mother's arms, until I simply fade away.
If you are willing to serve this purpose, please leave your number below (No, this is not a joke)
Quote from: Papageno on May 14, 2009, 05:54:04 PM
I've just come to a realisation; that I am a failure. I haven't achieved anything in my wretched life. I try to give birth to profound, functional art, and when I look at it in the morning it's a sentimental piece of garbage. I say I want to create art to help people, and yet I fail to do so. I have failed to pull a young girl out of the mud and make her into a better person, introduce her to the profound, I'm not saying I would make a great teacher, but could that little knowledge the possesses me be enough to convert a young girl from her banality to profundity? I have even failed to embrace profundity myself. I see beauty all the time, but I can never grasp it: The girl I saw on the train, or a woman I saw whom as Balzac would say was one of those that had a sort of intellectual beauty, that makes her look much more beautiful at thirty of forty than she was perhaps at fifteen. Ahh, yes, I'm an Apollonian drunkard who just turned Dionysian and can't deal with it.
All I yearn for now is to return to the womb. I want a woman to hold me in her arms, to kiss me and treat me tenderly, to remind of me those sweet days when I was in my mother's arms, until I simply fade away.
If you are willing to serve this purpose, please leave your number below (No, this is not a joke)
Yes. It is as grim as hell to feel so wretched. Fortunately though, you are talking nonsense.
Become a Phoenix, and as you rise you shall see the ashes below you, weak and scattered like the thoughts you once held, and crushed by the weight of your own illuminated transfiguration.
Now then...ahem...harrumph...after all that I'm off to start a New "PHOENIX" Religion. It's for people who reach 45 and over who need nudged out of the false reality they find themselves in...
Amazing how I was going to start an "I'm a Failure" thread...oy vey! At least the other threader finally "found a job!"
Mixing art and vaginas CAN be a sticky wicket, especially after cocktails. May I suggest Bruegel or Bosch?
Then again, a man spends 9 months getting out of the womb, and the rest of his life trying to get right back in.
My mom would tell me to go volunteer in a soup kitchen and stop feeling sorry for myself. She has. I didn't.
What's worse than a failed "artist?" I mean, the people who say, "It's all I know." What use in the real world is there for the...
See? See what happens? See how quickly "woe is me" takes over?
If I wasn't so hopped up on Chantix I'd probably be really depressed right now.
As the drummer in Spinal Tap once said, "Well, if there's sex and drugs, I guess I can do without the rock'n'roll."
oy! :)
Quote from: snyprrr on May 15, 2009, 03:07:59 AM
Amazing how I was going to start an "I'm a Failure" thread...oy vey! At least the other threader finally "found a job!"
Mixing art and vaginas CAN be a sticky wicket, especially after cocktails. May I suggest Bruegel or Bosch?
Then again, a man spends 9 months getting out of the womb, and the rest of his life trying to get right back in.
My mom would tell me to go volunteer in a soup kitchen and stop feeling sorry for myself. She has. I didn't.
What's worse than a failed "artist?" I mean, the people who say, "It's all I know." What use in the real world is there for the...
See? See what happens? See how quickly "woe is me" takes over?
If I wasn't so hopped up on Chantix I'd probably be really depressed right now.
As the drummer in Spinal Tap once said, "Well, if there's sex and drugs, I guess I can do without the rock'n'roll."
oy! :)
You have managed to confuse me.
By the way, I wasn't clear above. I'm not a
painter, I'm a director. Yes, Bosch and an Egyptian working-class girl once inspired me, but the result turned out looking like a rubbish Rossellini.
Quote from: Papageno on May 14, 2009, 05:54:04 PM
I want a woman to hold me in her arms, to kiss me and treat me tenderly, to remind of me those sweet days when I was in my mother's arms, until I simply fade away.
This should be doable, provided you have a wash and quit whining.
Millions have done it before.
Quote from: Herman on May 15, 2009, 04:56:58 AM
This should be doable, provided you have a wash and quit whining.
Millions have done it before.
Good, when shall we meet then?
Herman is not a woman. ;D
Quote from: Papageno on May 14, 2009, 05:54:04 PM
I've just come to a realisation; that I am a failure. I haven't achieved anything in my wretched life. I try to give birth to profound, functional art, and when I look at it in the morning it's a sentimental piece of garbage. I say I want to create art to help people, and yet I fail to do so.
Ever think of the accounting profession?
Quote from: Bulldog on May 15, 2009, 07:24:20 AM
Ever think of the accounting profession?
No, what is it? I'm guessing it has to do with money. Please! Money corrupts the soul. Watch Visconti's
The Damned. My grandfather was knighted for taking advantage of cheap labor in Africa. I'm the only
madman - as they call me - who is following a different path (sounds so naïve, doesn't it?), ...
Quote from: Papageno on May 14, 2009, 05:54:04 PM
If you are willing to serve this purpose, please leave your number below (No, this is not a joke)
Is this the place for this? I don't know about anybody else, but was deeply disturbed to come across this thread and find the public airing of the subject matter somewhat repulsive.
I am sure he was referring to something different, maybe in line with the money python "boring, boring, gawd-awful boring" profession of accounting, rathering than rolling in money.
BTW, in my profession as a psychologists, I come across situations 100 times worse than yours and people get better or feel better in matter of a few sessions. We often dig ourselves into a hole and lose all perepheral vision. You are nowhere near the end of the world.
Quote from: Papageno on May 15, 2009, 04:18:39 AM
I'm not a painter, I'm a director.
I went to film school. I fail to see a real difference.
btw- Viconti's "The Damned" one of my favs. ;)
but I must admit...the "penis arrow" avatar? seems not so much to cry out "existential angst" as much as it does "I'm really horny!" How do you think you made it to GMG in the first place? hmmm? ::) ;D ;D 0:)
Didn't that poet laureate John Cougar Mellencamp say, "Life goes on, even after the thrill of living is gone."? Have you tried buying looots of cds? It seems to work for people around here.
I'm being an ass, forgive me. 0:)
Quote from: snyprrr on May 15, 2009, 02:42:27 PM
I went to film school. I fail to see a real difference.
btw- Viconti's "The Damned" one of my favs. ;)
but I must admit...the "penis arrow" avatar? seems not so much to cry out "existential angst" as much as it does "I'm really horny!" How do you think you made it to GMG in the first place? hmmm? ::) ;D ;D 0:)
Didn't that poet laureate John Cougar Mellencamp say, "Life goes on, even after the thrill of living is gone."? Have you tried buying looots of cds? It seems to work for people around here.
I'm being an ass, forgive me. 0:)
You like the penis arrow? It's from Pasolini's
Arabian Nights. I can't say that I'm not horny, but when a bomb (existential breakdown) explodes next to you, it takes your attention away from fucking.
You say you see no difference. Cinema can be a utilitarian art form more easily that a painting. Watch Renoir's
La Grande Illusion then and tell me, can you put that message in a painting?
(http://www.loldawgz.com/dawgz/take-me-back.jpg)
And I prayed to the eager sword
To win my deliverance,
And have asked the perfidious vial
To redeem my cowardice.
Quote from: Papageno on May 15, 2009, 07:37:42 AM
No, what is it? I'm guessing it has to do with money. Please! Money corrupts the soul.
That's bull. At a minimum, it pays the bills.
Quote from: Bulldog on May 15, 2009, 04:43:47 PM
That's bull. At a minimum, it pays the bills.
Ah, my love:
Vanity of vanities, saith the Preacher, vanity of vanities; all is vanity. What profit hath a man of all his labour which he taketh under the sun? One generation passeth away, and another generation cometh: but the earth abideth for ever.So are we proletariats condemned to live a life in vanity?
I find this quote from Karl Menninger helpful:
'Unrest of the spirit is a mark of life; one problem after another presents itself and in the solving them we find our greatest pleasure'.
In fact a lot of what he says makes good sense to me. If you scroll down from the link below to 'wit and wisdom from Dr Karl' you might find something helpful - I hope so.
http://www.menningerclinic.com/about/early-history.htm#KarlMenninger
Since I stared a counsellor training and have tried to help others I have, paradoxically, helped myself to feel better about things.
I also recognise the importance of the fact that in Dante's 'The Inferno' the way out of Hell is through the centre. There is no way round.
'Give up and you will succeed' is a Taoist quotation which I think contains a strange paradoxical truth - John will agree I think :)
Pretentious nonsense? Perhaps, but sincerely meant.
Quote from: snyprrr on May 15, 2009, 03:07:59 AM
Mixing art and vaginas CAN be a sticky wicket, especially after cocktails. May I suggest Bruegel or Bosch?
Hilarious!
To the original poster - perhaps you should do art aimed at the community rather than make it for yourself and then hope it helps people. What do people need? My own mother designs the art/seating/layout for modern hospitals such that they can become an aesthetically pleasing and ultimately more healing experience, rather than the usual drab joylessness of these places. PM if you are interested in seeing her work.
EDIT: Woops! Just saw that you're
not a painter, but a director. For some reason I read it as being the other way round.
Quote from: Papageno on May 15, 2009, 04:47:29 PM
So are we proletariats condemned to live a life in vanity?
Being one, you're in the best position to answer the question.
...
Quote from: Papageno on May 17, 2009, 02:04:40 PM
Eeehm, I'm not sure I am... I've never had to work in my life, nor have my parents, nor grandparents...
You should 've told us before you're just a lazy bum. In that case the womb is not the solution, just find some work to do, preferably non-aristic.
Quote from: Papageno on May 17, 2009, 02:04:40 PM
Eeehm, I'm not sure I am... I've never had to work in my life, nor have my parents, nor grandparents...
And you're agonizing over not having achieved anything?
Isn't the link obvious to you? To feel you have a life, you actually have to have one.
Quote from: erato on May 19, 2009, 07:25:23 AM
And you're agonizing over not having achieved anything?
Isn't the link obvious to you? To feel you have a life, you actually have to have one.
Well, I've never worked as a laborer - although I would find it quite fascinating, but if I had the opportunity to work at the Covent Garden or National Theatre I'd run.
Quote from: Papageno on May 20, 2009, 07:07:47 PM
but if I had the opportunity to work at the Covent Garden or National Theatre I'd run.
But what you don't seem to understand is that opportunities doesn't happen like that, your dream opportunity doesn't by accident drop into your lap. They usually come as a result of ambition and hard work, and it is the fullfilment of achievements through striving that gives life meaning.
Quote from: Papageno on May 20, 2009, 07:07:47 PM
... but if I had the opportunity to work at the Covent Garden or National Theatre I'd run.
To paraphrase Seinfeld :D "Well, they tend to give those jobs to ex-performers and people that are, you know, in arts management."
if he really tried he could apply for cleaning the floors and toilets.
This womb is closed!