Cato's Grammar Grumble

[Opus106]

Lazy English is not a purely American pastime, you see.

True; but I assumed that this usage was from a dialect of Lazy English.

[Ten thumbs]

Very popular amongst my students is 'could of' when they mean 'could have'.

Do they also get 'off of' their chairs?

[Karl Henning]

Remove any of the Tracks you aren't comfortable with by selecting the Track(s) and pressing <Delete>. This will not delete any Tracks from the Library, it simply removes them from the Playlist.

Tracks you aren't comfortable with? You have got to bloody be kidding me . . . .

[North Star]

Tracks you aren't comfortable with? You have got to bloody be kidding me . . . .

They should have written 'Remove bad music by...' 
But then again, you'd want to remove those from the library, too.

[Cato]

Remove any of the Tracks you aren't comfortable with by selecting the Track(s) and pressing <Delete>. This will not delete any Tracks from the Library, it simply removes them from the Playlist.

Tracks you aren't comfortable with? You have got to bloody be kidding me . . . .

This could be a preciosity from the anti-bullying mania now sweeping the country.  Children are being told to tell the bully "I'm not comfortable with what you said," and of course any 10-year old bully will be shocked and start crying that s/he has made the recipient of her/his attention "uncomfortable."

A haymaker to the choppers, as history has shown, would do much more to stop bullying!   

[Cato]

This could be a preciosity from the anti-bullying mania now sweeping the country.  Children are being told to tell the bully "I'm not comfortable with what you said," and of course any 10-year old bully will be shocked and start crying that s/he has made the recipient of her/his attention "uncomfortable."

A haymaker to the choppers, as history has shown, would do much more to stop bullying!   

In an article from CBS New York about how "80% of NYC high school graduates can't read," we find things like "emersion" for "immersion,"  "classrom,"  "groulp," et al.

I almost thought it had to be a satire!  But...no.   

See:

http://newyork.cbslocal.com/2013/03/07/officials-80-percent-of-recent-nyc-high-school-graduates-cannot-read/

[Cato]

In an article from CBS New York about how "80% of NYC high school graduates can't read," we find things like "emersion" for "immersion,"  "classrom,"  "groulp," et al.

I almost thought it had to be a satire!  But...no.   

See:

http://newyork.cbslocal.com/2013/03/07/officials-80-percent-of-recent-nyc-high-school-graduates-cannot-read/

Update from New York Magazine, which comments on the badly written article from CBS:

http://nymag.com/daily/intelligencer/2013/03/80-of-nyc-high-school-grads-not-illiterate.html

[Florestan]

The man that hath no music in himself,
Nor is not mov'd with concord of sweet sounds,
Is fit for treasons, stratagems, and spoils.

That double negation in the second verse, is it okay? And "the man that' ? 

[Karl Henning]

As has been said: the Elizabethans were eloquent, before they were grammarians : )

[kishnevi]

As has been said: the Elizabethans were eloquent, before they were grammarians : )

Nor had they greate regard for the maxims of Orthographie. 

It's probably better to say that the English language, in so far as it had fixed rules of grammar, did not have the same exact rules as we do.  It is four hundreds years and more, after all, and vernacular languages were just establishing themselves as something more than the language for every day affairs, and local dialects were of more importance.  Grammar as we know it, along with orthography, didn't really get formulated for English until the 18th century, when intellectuals were intent on creating some equivalent of an "academic" language--academic here being a reference not to higher learning but to such groups as the French Academy.  The concept of a double negative probably had no real meaning for Shakespeare.  And, of course, it's poetry.

[knight66]

Being shown to a restaurant table this week, the young woman dealing with bookings said, "Would you please follow myself?"

Mike

[Florestan]

Nor had they greate regard for the maxims of Orthographie.

It's probably better to say that the English language, in so far as it had fixed rules of grammar, did not have the same exact rules as we do.  It is four hundreds years and more, after all, and vernacular languages were just establishing themselves as something more than the language for every day affairs, and local dialects were of more importance.  Grammar as we know it, along with orthography, didn't really get formulated for English until the 18th century, when intellectuals were intent on creating some equivalent of an "academic" language--academic here being a reference not to higher learning but to such groups as the French Academy.  The concept of a double negative probably had no real meaning for Shakespeare.  And, of course, it's poetry.

Quite so.

As an aside, the double negation is the norm in Romanian, so "nor is not moved" makes perfect sense to me. 

[kishnevi]

Found on a blog I generally read every day>  Not all grammar related, but enough to make it on-topic here

1. WHAT IF THERE WERE NO HYPOTHETICAL QUESTIONS?

2. IS THERE ANOTHER WORD FOR SYNONYM?

3. WHERE DO FOREST RANGERS GO TO "GET AWAY FROM IT ALL"?

4. WHAT DO YOU DO WHEN YOU SEE AN ENDANGERED ANIMAL EATING AN ENDANGERED PLANT?

5. WHY DO THEY LOCK GAS STATION BATHROOMS? ARE THEY AFRAID SOMEONE WILL BREAK IN AND CLEAN THEM?

6. IF A TURTLE DOESN'T HAVE A SHELL, IS HE HOMELESS OR NAKED?

7. WHAT WAS THE BEST THING BEFORE SLICED BREAD?

8. ONE NICE THING ABOUT EGOTISTS: THEY DON'T TALK ABOUT OTHER PEOPLE.

9. DOES THE LITTLE MERMAID WEAR AN ALGEBRA?

10. WOULD A FLY WITHOUT WINGS BE CALLED A WALK?

11. IF YOU ATE BOTH PASTA AND ANTIPASTO, WOULD YOU STILL BE HUNGRY?

12. IF YOU TRY TO FAIL, AND SUCCEED, WHICH HAVE YOU DONE?

13. WHOSE CRUEL IDEA WAS IT FOR THE WORD 'LISP' TO HAVE 'S' IN IT?

14. DO INFANTS ENJOY INFANCY AS MUCH AS ADULTS ENJOY ADULTERY?

15. IF YOU SPIN AN ORIENTAL MAN IN A CIRCLE THREE TIMES, DOES HE BECOME DISORIENTED?

Found here: http://thewoundedbird.blogspot.com/

[Cato]

Found on a blog I generally read every day>  Not all grammar related, but enough to make it on-topic here

1. WHAT IF THERE WERE NO HYPOTHETICAL QUESTIONS?

2. IS THERE ANOTHER WORD FOR SYNONYM?

3. WHERE DO FOREST RANGERS GO TO "GET AWAY FROM IT ALL"?

4. WHAT DO YOU DO WHEN YOU SEE AN ENDANGERED ANIMAL EATING AN ENDANGERED PLANT?

5. WHY DO THEY LOCK GAS STATION BATHROOMS? ARE THEY AFRAID SOMEONE WILL BREAK IN AND CLEAN THEM?

6. IF A TURTLE DOESN'T HAVE A SHELL, IS HE HOMELESS OR NAKED?

7. WHAT WAS THE BEST THING BEFORE SLICED BREAD?

8. ONE NICE THING ABOUT EGOTISTS: THEY DON'T TALK ABOUT OTHER PEOPLE.

9. DOES THE LITTLE MERMAID WEAR AN ALGEBRA?

10. WOULD A FLY WITHOUT WINGS BE CALLED A WALK?

11. IF YOU ATE BOTH PASTA AND ANTIPASTO, WOULD YOU STILL BE HUNGRY?

12. IF YOU TRY TO FAIL, AND SUCCEED, WHICH HAVE YOU DONE?

13. WHOSE CRUEL IDEA WAS IT FOR THE WORD 'LISP' TO HAVE 'S' IN IT?

14. DO INFANTS ENJOY INFANCY AS MUCH AS ADULTS ENJOY ADULTERY?

15. IF YOU SPIN AN ORIENTAL MAN IN A CIRCLE THREE TIMES, DOES HE BECOME DISORIENTED?

Found here: http://thewoundedbird.blogspot.com/

1. Then there would be no hypothetical answers!

2. Yes, cinnamon.

3. The desert.

4. Offer the animal an environmentalist to eat instead.

5. No, they are afraid someone will start living there.

6. Yes.

7. Unsliced bread.

8. Amen.

9. No, she wears brachiopods.  Really! 

10. No, it would be dead.

11. I would be: I hate both.

12. Both.

13.  Thpeech therapiththth

14. Adultery is not fun: it's infantile.

15. Yes, his disorientation will be very occidental.

Today I saw an ad in Ohio Magazine (of all places) for a love emporium in a Columbus suburb, offering "special lingerie" and also...

"romantic equipment."     Interesting turn of phrase!

[kishnevi]

1. Then there would be no hypothetical answers!

2. Yes, cinnamon.

3. The desert.

4. Offer the animal an environmentalist to eat instead.

5. No, they are afraid someone will start living there.

6. Yes.

7. Unsliced bread.

8. Amen.

9. No, she wears brachiopods.  Really! 

10. No, it would be dead.

11. I would be: I hate both.

12. Both.

13.  Thpeech therapiththth

14. Adultery is not fun: it's infantile.

15. Yes, his disorientation will be very occidental.

Today I saw an ad in Ohio Magazine (of all places) for a love emporium in a Columbus suburb, offering "special lingerie" and also...

"romantic equipment."     Interesting turn of phrase!

To be perfectly honest,  the phrase love emporium has some interesting resonances....

There's a Hustler superstore in Fort Lauderdale.  Big box stores for everything, it seems!

[Cato]

Found on a blog I generally read every day>  Not all grammar related, but enough to make it on-topic here

1. WHAT IF THERE WERE NO HYPOTHETICAL QUESTIONS?

2. IS THERE ANOTHER WORD FOR SYNONYM?

3. WHERE DO FOREST RANGERS GO TO "GET AWAY FROM IT ALL"?

4. WHAT DO YOU DO WHEN YOU SEE AN ENDANGERED ANIMAL EATING AN ENDANGERED PLANT?

5. WHY DO THEY LOCK GAS STATION BATHROOMS? ARE THEY AFRAID SOMEONE WILL BREAK IN AND CLEAN THEM?

6. IF A TURTLE DOESN'T HAVE A SHELL, IS HE HOMELESS OR NAKED?

7. WHAT WAS THE BEST THING BEFORE SLICED BREAD?

8. ONE NICE THING ABOUT EGOTISTS: THEY DON'T TALK ABOUT OTHER PEOPLE.

9. DOES THE LITTLE MERMAID WEAR AN ALGEBRA?

10. WOULD A FLY WITHOUT WINGS BE CALLED A WALK?

11. IF YOU ATE BOTH PASTA AND ANTIPASTO, WOULD YOU STILL BE HUNGRY?

12. IF YOU TRY TO FAIL, AND SUCCEED, WHICH HAVE YOU DONE?

13. WHOSE CRUEL IDEA WAS IT FOR THE WORD 'LISP' TO HAVE 'S' IN IT?

14. DO INFANTS ENJOY INFANCY AS MUCH AS ADULTS ENJOY ADULTERY?

15. IF YOU SPIN AN ORIENTAL MAN IN A CIRCLE THREE TIMES, DOES HE BECOME DISORIENTED?

Found here: http://thewoundedbird.blogspot.com/

1. Then there would be no hypothetical answers!

2. Yes, cinnamon.

3. The desert.

4. Offer the animal an environmentalist to eat instead.

5. No, they are afraid someone will start living there.

6. Yes.

7. Unsliced bread.

8. Amen.

9. No, she wears brachiopods.  Really! 

10. No, it would be dead.

11. I would be: I hate both.

12. Both.

13.  Thpeech therapiththth

14. Adultery is not fun: it's infantile.

15. Yes, his disorientation will be very occidental.

Today I saw an ad in Ohio Magazine (of all places) for a love emporium in a Columbus suburb, offering "special lingerie" and also...

"romantic equipment."     Interesting turn of phrase!

To be perfectly honest,  the phrase love emporium has some interesting resonances....

There's a Hustler superstore in Fort Lauderdale.  Big box stores for everything, it seems!

Germany for years had a chain-store operation of "love emporia" for "romantic equipment" and (I assume) pornography run by a grandmotherly dominatrix called Beate Uhse.

Perhaps it was more of a whips-and-chain-store operation.   0:)

[DavidRoss]

Germany for years had a chain-store operation of "love emporia" for "romantic equipment" and (I assume) pornography run by a grandmotherly dominatrix called Beate Uhse.

Wonderful. Like the New Orleans bankruptcy lawyer named Robin Cheatham.

[Cato]

Germany for years had a chain-store operation of "love emporia" for "romantic equipment" and (I assume) pornography run by a grandmotherly dominatrix called Beate Uhse.

Perhaps it was more of a whips-and-chain-store operation.   0:)

Wonderful. Like the New Orleans bankruptcy lawyer named Robin Cheatham.

The joke only works in English: "Bay-ah-tuh" is the German pronunciation of the first name, although "Ooh-suh" could be a sound caused by "romantic equipment."   0:)

[The Six]

Cadenza's to Shostakovich 1st violin concerto and 1st cello concerto

[Karl Henning]

"A set which, like the Bible and Shakespeare, ought rightly to accompany any thnking person to a desert island."
Gramophone

A typo for the ages.