My Wife Knows Best

[Satzaroo]

As a safety measure, my wife and I both initially wore fanny packs in Paris.   A couple of weeks later when we were riding in the metro, someone mentioned to my wife that her fanny pack was partially unzipped. My wife got alarmed and quickly closed it. The next day, another passenger noticed the same thing. Either the zipper was opening on its own, or my wife was remiss. In any case, she decided to discard the fanny pack and buy a voluminous purse with a fool-proof flap that would more readily secure her valuables. At the same time, she told me to get a satchel for myself. I stubbornly refused. I didn't want something so bulky strapped to me. My shirt (or windbreaker) sufficiently covered my fanny pack, and even if I had a zipper mishap, my stuff would still be safe. False bravado!

Soon afterward, we toured Montmartre, ending up at the glistening Church of Saint Coeur. Before leaving, we went to the crowded gift shop, where people were squeezed against me. I soon disentangled myself and waited outside the church for my wife. It was noon by then—time for some lunch. But when I reached for my fanny pack, I discovered that one compartment was unzipped: my money, credit card, and driver's license were gone. Damn. If only my inflated male ego hadn't trumped my wife's advice. It was not a catastrophe: I had few Euros, I quickly put a hold on my credit card, and I didn't need my driver's license until I got home, and most importantly, my passport was at the condo. But then I had another setback to my self esteem. As I was returning to the metro station, I saw a large sign stating that pickpockets were a notorious menace in Montmartre. If I had noticed that warning, I probably would have been more vigilant at the church.


Doubly humbled, the next day I purchased a contraption like my wife's. It was much more cumbersome than the fanny pack, and it had a daunting overabundance of compartments. Nevertheless, I counted on it for protection against negligence or theft. And it didn't fail me during the rest of the trip.

Even though I now use a more streamlined one, I still keep my Paris satchel. I think of it every time I am tempted to pooh-pooh any of my wife's suggestions or admonitions. And I will always remember that fanny packs do not cover your fanny.

[Cato]

The title of your essay is the foundation for a happy marriage!   0:)

[karlhenning]

. . . I think of it every time I am tempted to pooh-pooh any of my wife's suggestions or admonitions.

My good angels keep that temptation a very great distance from me.

[Joe Barron]

Who is this guy?