Joe, you're a celebrity, dude!
I never dreamed I'd be the author of a genuine hoax, if you'll forgive the oxymoron. As long as the piece makes the rounds anonymously, though, I don't mind being famous.
Guido, thanks for your thoughts. I have to say it took me a long, long time to really get into the Piano Concerto, but contrary to your impression, I did not find it "forever distant." Today I can follow it note for note, and for me, it is one of Carter.s most compelling works. Listen especially for the violin and wind solos (flute, English horn, bass clarinet) in the second movement. They go by quickly, but they provide signposts to the action. There is also, near the end, the repeated "F" from the piano as the strings build up into a dense tone cluster. As I have said in an online review, this is a brutal, tragic, heartbreaking work, but it's unlike anything anyone else has ever written, which means it takes some getting used to. I'd recommend, too, that you invest in the New World disk with Oppens and Gielen conducting the Cincinnati Symphony, if you have not already. It's the most gripping performance available.
The Double Concerto is quieter, more lyrical, and --- dare I say it? --- prettier than the Piano Concerto. It seems less coherent, less forward-directed, but it has many lovely moments. I am particularly fond of the harpsichord cadenza near the beginning, and the adagio. There's a beautiful moment when the lower woodwinds seem to open up like a stop-action film of a blooming flower.
I'm sorry if I can't give you a key that will automatically unlock the treasures in these works. All I can say is, keep listening. They do become apparent eventually.