I thought maybe we could have some fun by creating a thread where no one is serious about anything they say. No topic other than let's see how long we can go joking around about whatever, having fun, but NOT being serious.
(Of course this post is serious, but any from here forward won't be serious.) :)
Dark chocolate does not taste like tar.
. . . and he says, "But what was the dinosaur doing in the bathroom in the first place?"
Oh freddled gruntbuggly, Thy micturations are to me...
i'm tired of eating italian wedding soup. damn costco.
And you expect me to take this thread seriously?
Oh, you don't ...
You've just got to let go.
No, that was not serious advice.
Quote from: karlhenning on November 14, 2007, 08:14:36 AM
You've just got to let go.
I'm not falling for
that one again, Dr Henning. Last time I did, I soiled myself. :-[
There was an old man from Nantucket...
Quote from: sound sponge on November 14, 2007, 08:16:16 AM
There was an old man from Nantucket...
Who purchased an oversized bucket ...
Nantucket is not an old man's land
Quote from: Mark on November 14, 2007, 08:15:54 AM
I'm not falling for that one again, Dr Henning. Last time I did, I soiled myself. :-[
On the other hand, when changing diapers,
know where all the various materials are, at
all times.
Quote from: karlhenning on November 14, 2007, 08:21:32 AM
On the other hand, when changing diapers, know where all the various materials are, at all times.
Amen to that, brother. 0:)
We are way off track here...
BRAVO!!! 8)
Quote from: George on November 14, 2007, 08:24:25 AM
We are way off track here...
BRAVO!!! 8)
There's always one to shout, 'BRAVO!' before the closing notes of a symphony have died away. I'd like to meet and beat that guy. >:(
;D
Message to self: never visit England unless in disguise. ;D
I love Hindemith's opera about a man and his car:
(http://www.velocityjournal.com/images/logos/cadillac.jpg)
The sky is falling! :o
Oh wait, it's just leaves falling from a tree. Whew! ::)
Take me on the duck tour, Syd.
So, does that mean I'm supposed to take the other threads seriously? ???
Threads are serious, of course, if you are a shirt.
Of course, if you don't give a shirt, you should at least give a sock.
And then the guy will call his lawyer, and you'll end up losing your shirt!
And then people will needle you, but of course we all needle each other, don't we?
Like Barbra Streisand! :o
I needle her like a haystack, which sounds obscene, sew it must be time to go!
My field is vibrating.
Quote from: George on November 14, 2007, 10:46:12 AM
You can't be serious. ::)
I am serious.
And don't call me Shirley.
Quote from: brianrein on November 14, 2007, 11:10:34 AM
I am serious.
And don't call me Shirley.
Ok, I'll call you Laverne then. ;D
That's what I'm talking about - some good clean fun. :)
Quote from: johnQpublic on November 14, 2007, 10:59:06 AM
My field is vibrating.
You've been hit by the
|^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^| ,,
| Too Much Information Truck | '|""";.||.___.
|_..._...__________________==== _|__|..., ] |
"(@ )'(@ )"""""""""""""""""""""""*|(@ )(@ )*****(@)
Quote from: brianrein on November 14, 2007, 11:21:45 AM
You've been hit by the
|^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^| ,,
| Too Much Information Truck | '|""";.||.___.
|_..._...__________________==== _|__|..., ] |
"(@ )'(@ )"""""""""""""""""""""""*|(@ )(@ )*****(@)
Great little drawing! Did you do that, or is it from somewhere else?
--Bruce
Quote from: bhodges on November 14, 2007, 11:25:45 AM
Great little drawing! Did you do that, or is it from somewhere else?
--Bruce
Oh, I borrowed it. ;D
Working that up on your own, Brian, would have been inappropriately serious ;D
@Karl - indeed! ;D
Quote from: Mark on November 14, 2007, 10:00:52 AM
That's brilliant! ;D
If
you
thought
that
was
clever!
Wait
till
you
see
this.
Bruckner wrote music that is way too simple for my ears...I'd take Britney Spears over that old fart anyday.
Quote from: G...R...E...G... on November 14, 2007, 12:13:31 PM
That was extremely accessible.
Oh, if that's the case try this:
(http://aggiefamilypack.ucdavis.edu/0106/images/access_denied.jpg)
Why is the french horn called the "divine instrument"?
Because a person blows into it...
...but God only knows what comes out of it...
Quote from: brianrein on November 14, 2007, 11:10:34 AM
I am serious.
And don't call me Shirley.
Now
that is always funny.
(http://www.dvdtimes.co.uk/images/airplane7.jpg)
I've got ninety-thousand pounds in my pajamas!
Quote from: XB-70 Valkyrie on November 14, 2007, 08:00:24 PM
I've got ninety-thousand pounds in my pajamas!
And forty thousand French francs in my fridge!
Sorry:
Rex Kramer: Do you know what it's like to fall in the mud and get kicked... in the head... with an iron boot? Of course you don't, no one does. It never happens. It's a dumb question... skip it.
Quote from: XB-70 Valkyrie on November 14, 2007, 08:00:24 PM
I've got ninety-thousand pounds in my pajamas!
Try Slim Fast!
Apples oranges onions and Trees
Whats not right here?
Quote from: Saul on November 15, 2007, 04:23:35 AM
Apples oranges onions and Trees
Whats not right here?
umm........ one of them isn't tasty- onions
Platonic plate tectonics lead to platypus paralysis.
Quote from: Saul on November 15, 2007, 04:23:35 AM
Apples oranges onions and Trees
Whats not right here?
The answer is: you forgot the apostrophe in "what's" ! :o
The other answer is: what's not
left here?
The other other answer is: Capitalize
Oranges and
Onions!
And stop making jokes about orangutans! >:D
And
Saul: that's a great first line for a song! Get to work! 8)
Tranquil ankles
Quote from: Bogey on November 14, 2007, 08:25:34 PM
Sorry:
Rex Kramer: Do you know what it's like to fall in the mud and get kicked... in the head... with an iron boot? Of course you don't, no one does. It never happens. It's a dumb question... skip it.
Joey, do like movies about gladiators? Ever done time in a Turkish prison? ;D
Turtle turtle
Quote from: Saul on November 15, 2007, 04:23:35 AM
Apples oranges onions and Trees
Whats not right here?
I'm working on either apples or oranges. Which one doesn't have rings?
Jupiter
BY
Rumack: Captain, how soon can you land?
Captain Oveur: I can't tell.
Rumack: You can tell me. I'm a doctor.
Captain Oveur: No. I mean I'm just not sure.
Rumack: Well, can't you take a guess?
Captain Oveur: Well, not for another two hours.
Rumack: You can't take a guess for another two hours?
"These all go to eleven."
Blikk: Madonna, Budapest says hello with arms that are spread-eagled. Did you have a visit here that was agreeable? Are you in good odor? You are the biggest fan of our young people who hear your musical productions and like to move their bodies in response.
Madonna: Thank you for saying these compliments [holds up hands]. Please stop with taking sensationalist photographs until I have removed my garments for all to see [laughs]. This is a joke I have made.
Blikk: Madonna, let's cut toward the hunt: Are you a bold hussy-woman that feasts on men who are tops?
Madonna: Yes, yes, this is certainly something that brings to the surface my longings. In America it is not considered to be mentally ill when a woman advances on her prey in a discotheque setting with hardy cocktails present. And there is a more normal attitude toward leather play-toys that also makes my day.
Shop at Saks!
Our bikinis are simply the tops!
Top that!!
The notorious architectural digest.
Flip Flop and everything in between.
(http://www.cannonbullock.com/Images/WallCoverings/ChinaWall/Couture/Examples/architectural_digest-mar_1999.jpg)
i hate everything
...... oh wait, this thread isn't supposed to be serious. Nevermind.
Sushi is Japanese food.
Sue she - a female lawyer.
sew she- Your grandma doing for you a sweater.
Suzy- Your girlfriend.
Suppe- unrelated Viennese composer he hated Sushi and so will you after listening to his music:
http://www.koorbegeleidingen.nl/MIDI/Suppe-Leichte_Cavallerie.mid
Quote from: GBJGZW on November 15, 2007, 04:04:54 PM
now, why do we need to listen to "light cavalry"?
To start hating Sushi...
I wish I could play my instrument extremely well. Well enough, that I wouldn't suck ;D
Quote from: A Deceptive Cadence on November 15, 2007, 06:29:39 PM
I wish I could play my instrument extremely well. Well enough, that I wouldn't suck ;D
Well, if you play your instrument extremely well, that would make you not "Suck".
I am never completely not serious. Everything I say has a twinge of truth, even if I am joking. Maybe especially if I am joking.
Quote from: Corey on November 16, 2007, 04:31:51 AM
I am never completely not serious. Everything I say has a twinge of truth, even if I am joking. Maybe especially if I am joking.
::)
Can I go mambo dogface in the banana patch?
BUUUUUUUUUUUUURRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRPPPPPPPPPPPPPPP
Dear Sir!
I must protest! I have the feeling that a degree of seriousness exists in the
Completely Not Serious Thread!For example, this comment:
QuoteBUUUUUUUUUUUUURRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRPPPPPPPPPPPPPPP
shows a serious lack of taste and maturity, and a serious case of indigestion!
Plus we have this serious admission:
QuoteI am never completely not serious.
Please see to it that this false advertising never happens again!
And I'm serious!
Regards,
Cato
Quote from: Cato on November 16, 2007, 06:13:14 AM
Please see to it that this false advertising never happens again!
And I'm serious!
Regards,
Cato
I'm not in the habit of advertising myself. Nobody would buy it. :D
Quote from: Cato on November 16, 2007, 06:13:14 AM
Dear Sir!
I must protest! I have the feeling that a degree of seriousness exists in the Completely Not Serious Thread!
For example, this comment:
shows a serious lack of taste and maturity, and a serious case of indigestion!
you caught me...... being seriously not not serious :-[
(http://www.bullwinkleblog.com/wp-content/photos/al_gore_is_manbearpig.jpg)
Why doesn't anyone take me serial?!!!
I'm perturbed by the increasing triviality of this board. Has this Diner gone down hill recently?? Shouldn't we have more detailed technical discussion of what you look like, what you're eating, or the evil consequences of Sun Worship? Don't just tell me what your favorite TV program is, make it work for me! >:( How does it fit in with your aesthetic theory, dammit!
Sorry for the shouting, it's just that sometimes I get so frustrated I just want to
Quote from: drogulus on November 16, 2007, 06:37:22 AM
Shouldn't we have more detailed technical discussion of what you look like, what you're eating...
I would like to know what people look like when they are eating...
Quote from: Cato on November 16, 2007, 06:13:14 AM
Dear Sir!
I must protest! I have the feeling that a degree of seriousness exists in the Completely Not Serious Thread!
For example, this comment:
shows a serious lack of taste and maturity, and a serious case of indigestion!
Plus we have this serious admission:
Please see to it that this false advertising never happens again!
And I'm serious!
Regards,
Cato
You're out of line, mister! $:)
Quote from: drogulus on November 16, 2007, 06:37:22 AM
I'm perturbed by the increasing triviality of this board. Has this Diner gone down hill recently?? Shouldn't we have more detailed technical discussion of what you look like, what you're eating, or the evil consequences of Sun Worship? Don't just tell me what your favorite TV program is, make it work for me! >:( How does it fit in with your aesthetic theory, dammit!
Sorry for the shouting, it's just that sometimes I get so frustrated I just want to
;D
Quote from: George on November 16, 2007, 07:29:31 AM
You're out of line, mister! $:)
Hey! That sounds serious! $:)
Quote from: Cato on November 16, 2007, 07:52:07 AM
Hey! That sounds serious! $:)
I assure you I am on topic. 8)
(Though this post isn't) ::)
A new rapport, you and your new green and yellow buddies
Quote from: Lethe on November 16, 2007, 06:52:31 AM
I would like to know what people look like when they are eating...
Actually, for some people, watching obese people eat is a sexual turn-on.
Seriously.
I read it in the love advice column of
The Onion. ;D The advice-giver said, "Well, so, what, if you want to watch eating p0rn do you just go to McDonalds?"
Quote from: brianrein on November 16, 2007, 09:37:39 AM
Actually, for some people, watching obese people eat is a sexual turn-on.
Seriously.
I read it in the love advice column of The Onion. ;D The advice-giver said, "Well, so, what, if you want to watch eating p0rn do you just go to McDonalds?"
Yep, this is one of the horrors I have read about on sites like SomethingAwful, and then seen in detail on YouTube :'(
Example: Part 1 (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=prD9eB2u0Og), Part 2 (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lDes6sz1PSg).
Jingle Bells, Batman smells............
Nitwit, blubber, oddment, tweak!
Leather, rattle, woollens, shriek!
Kumquat, titillate, titmouse, Wankel engine
Quote from: Corey on November 17, 2007, 07:52:54 PM
Kumquat, titillate, titmouse, Wankel engine
Hey, we was rhyming over here!
When they see us coming, the birdies all try and hide
But they still go for peanuts when coated with cyanide!
Wagon man ..Wagon man... wagon man...
Up the hill........ now down the hill...
Push and push ... pull and pull
Walla... its not french .. nor elvish folk...
Stunning as it may seem... its only a wagon man....
6790039587
Quote from: brianrein on November 18, 2007, 04:02:30 PM
bottles of beer on the wall?
As long as I don't have to sing it all the way through with my daughter once she's of an age to want such songs, then you can put up as many green bottles as the wall can support. ;D
Why does Ice cream have to taste really good, but not that good for you?
I love Ice Cream!
Quote from: A Deceptive Cadence on November 18, 2007, 04:55:27 PM
Why does Ice cream have to taste really good, but not that good for you?
I love Ice Cream!
it's a conspiracy.
I was laughing out loud at my desk reading this. Will provide a good laugh for some who work or have worked in an office. ;D
HOW TO POOP AT WORK
We've all been there but don't like to admit it. We've all kicked
back in our chairs
and suddenly felt something brewing down below. As much as we try to
convince ourselves
otherwise, the work poo is inevitable. For those who hate pooping at
work, consider the
following survival guide:
CROP DUSTING: When farting, you walk briskly around the office so the
smell is not in your area and everyone else gets a whiff but doesn't know where it came
from. Be careful when you do this. Do not stop until the full fart has been expelled.
Walk an extra thirty feet to make sure the smell has left your pants.
FLY BY: The act of scouting out a bathroom before pooping.Walk in and
check for other poopers. If there are others in the bathroom, leave and come back
again. Be careful not to become a frequent flyer - people may become suspicious if they catch you constantly going into the bathroom.
THE ESCAPEE: A fart that slips out while taking a leak or forcing a
small poop in a stall. This is usually accompanied by a sudden wave of embarassment.
If you release and escapee, do not acknowledge it. Pretend it did not happen. If you
are in the stall next to the farter, pretend you did not hear it. No one likes an
escapee. It is uncomfortable for all involved. Making a joke or laughing makes both
parties feel uneasy.
JAILBREAK: When forcing a poop, several farts slip out at a machine
gun pace. This is usually a side effect of a hangover. If this should happen, do not
panic. Remain in the stall until everyone has left the bathroom to spare everyone the
awkwardness of what just occurred.
COURTESY FLUSH: The act of flushing the toilet the instant the poop
hits the water.
This reduces the amount of time the poop has to stink up the bathroom.
This can help you avoid the WALK OF SHAME.
WALK OF SHAME: Walking from the stall, to the sink, to the door after
you have just stunk up the bathroom. This can be a very uncomfortable moment if
someone walks in and busts you. As with farts, it is best to pretend that the smell does not exist. Can be avoided with use of the COURTESY FLUSH.
OUT OF THE CLOSET POOPER: A colleague who poops at work and is damn
proud of it. You will often see an out-of-the-closet-pooper enter the bathroom with a
newspaper or magazine under his or her arm. Always look around the office for the
out-of-the-closet-pooper before entering the bathroom.
THE POOPING FRIENDS NETWORK (P.F.N): A group of co-workers who band
together to ensure emergency pooping goes off without incident. This group can help you monitor the whereabouts of out-of-the-closet-poopers and identify SAFE HAVENS.
SAFE HAVENS: Seldom used bathrooms somewhere in the building where
you can least expect visitors. Try floors that are predominantly of the opposite
sex. This will reduce the odds of a pooper of your sex entering the bathroom.
TURD BURGLAR: Someone who does not realize you are in the stall and
tries to force the door open. This is one of the most shocking and vulnerable moments that can occur when taking a poop at work. If this occurs, remain in the stall until the turd burglar leaves. This way you will avoid any uncomfortable eye contact.
CAMO-COUGH: A phoney cough that alerts new entrants into the bathroom
that you are in a stall. This can be used to cover up a WATERMELON, or to alert potential TURD BURGLARS. Very effective when used in conjunction with an ASTAIRE.
ASTAIRE: The subtle toe-tap that is used to alert potential turd burglars that you are
occupying a stall. This will remove all doubt that the stall is occupied. If you hear
an astaire, leave the bathroom immediately so the pooper can poo in
peace.
WATERMELON: A poop that creates a loud splash when hitting the toilet
water. This is also an embarassing incident. If you feel a watermelon coming on,
create a diversion.
See COURTESY FLUSH and CAMO-COUGH.
HAVANA OMELETTE: A case of diarrhea that creates a series of loud
splashes in the toilet water. Often accompanied by an escapee. Try using CAMO-COUGH with an ASTAIRE or COURTESY FLUSH.
Chamber Nut, I can honestly say without exaggeration that I have never laughed so hard reading anything on this forum. (Thankfully no farts escaped while I was laughing uncontrollably.
Thanks so much! :D
Quote from: George on April 04, 2008, 05:20:51 PM
Chamber Nut, I can honestly say without exaggeration that I have never laughed so hard reading anything on this forum. (Thankfully no farts escaped while I was laughing uncontrollably.
Thanks so much! :D
Glad you enjoyed it George. I had a hard time not laughing out loud at work while reading this. It was early in the morning, so not many people were at work yet, thank goodness. ;D
If only, instead of starting multiple versions of the same navel-gazing thread, Sean would just plug into this one . . . .
Quote from: karlhenning on April 05, 2008, 12:48:25 PM
If only, instead of starting multiple versions of the same navel-gazing thread, Sean would just plug into this one . . . .
Sean's are all sub-threads of this one, aren't they? ???
8)
----------------
Listening to:
Dvorak Op 033 - Richter Bavarian RSO/ C. Kleiber - Dvorak Concerto in g for Piano Op 33 1st mvmt
Gurn, lad! It's been a long age!
Quote from: karlhenning on April 05, 2008, 12:59:21 PM
Gurn, lad! It's been a long age!
Indeed it has. Been a tough slog the last 6 weeks or so, better now though. :)
8)
----------------
Listening to:
Dvorak Op 033 - Richter Bavarian RSO/ C. Kleiber - Dvorak Concerto in g for Piano Op 33 2nd mvmt
Quote from: karlhenning on April 05, 2008, 12:48:25 PM
If only, instead of starting multiple versions of the same navel-gazing thread, Sean would just plug into this one . . . .
Isn't Sean
serious, though? :-\
Quote from: George on April 05, 2008, 03:07:42 PM
Isn't Sean serious, though? :-\
I hadn't thought so. I believe he is only as serious as your perception of him is. So, you will have to take the entire blame, George... :D
8)
----------------
Listening to:
Robert Levin/John Eliot Gardiner - Bia 425 Op 36alt Trio in D for Piano & Strings (arr of Symphony #2) 1st mvmt - Adagio - Allegro con brio
Quote from: Gurn Blanston on April 05, 2008, 04:00:09 PM
I hadn't thought so. I believe he is only as serious as your perception of him is. So, you will have to take the entire blame, George... :D
8)
Perfect for this thread, Gurn, hilarious. ;D
Quote from: George on April 05, 2008, 04:48:41 PM
Perfect for this thread, Gurn, hilarious. ;D
Thanks, George. You might want to check out my contribution to his latest thread too. I love Sean, seriously, he's the cat's ass. :)
8)
----------------
Listening to: Mozart--Cmplt Pno Sons (CD 2) - Roland Brautigam Vol.2 - SONATA IN D MAJOR, KV 284 (NO. 6)--II. Rondeau en polonaise. Andante
Quote from: Gurn Blanston on April 05, 2008, 04:56:33 PM
Thanks, George. You might want to check out my contribution to his latest thread too. I love Sean, seriously, he's the cat's ass. :)
Is that a good thing? If it is, is it an entirely good thing or a mixed blessing?
Mike
Asia's popcorn tastes bitter when sauteed, just like its people.
-Pass the pigeons, Penny.
-Mind the mustard, Margaret.
-Lovely weather.
-Gob, gob, gob, gob, gobbledy gobbledy gee!
I'm writing an English paper and my brain is bored.
The day before yesterday, I made up this completely stupid joke, and mostly just at the thought that I had just made up this, like, completely stupid joke, I was near convulsed in laughter at myself, and it all I could do to maintain composure, which after all my office-mates do rely upon me to maintain.
It goes like this:
What brings the tablets of the law down from the mountain, and checks your body temperature?
Charlton Rectum.
Quote from: karlhenning on April 18, 2008, 10:11:25 AM
The day before yesterday, I made up this completely stupid joke, and mostly just at the thought that I had just made up this, like, completely stupid joke, I was near convulsed in laughter at myself, and it all I could do to maintain composure, which after all my office-mates do rely upon me to maintain.
It goes like this:
What brings the tablets of the law down from the mountain, and checks your body temperature?
Charlton Rectum.
Rectum? Damn near killed 'im!
;D