The most boring music you've heard

[btpaul674]

The most boring music I've ever heard is what plays in the background at grocery stores. I'm not talking about 'classic' muzak. I'm talking about the Muzak radio stations for businesses that contains selections from old and new pop 'stars'. Since I work at a store, I get to hear songs by 'American Idols', cheesy 70's music where everyone sounds like either the Bee Gees, Phil Collins, or Chicago, "smooth" jazz that has noting at all to do with jazz, "crossover" country that is just your standard pop, and even boyband type singers. Every song is sentimental in a forced way, has the same recursive structure as if no other way of writing existed other than verse-chorus-verse-chorus-bridge-chorus! This music is boring not only for the intellect, but also to the senses. I DEFY anyone to write it off as mere entertainment. It's TORTURE!

I'm going to tell you that Muzak is some of the most brilliant music ever devised. Muzak, as well as many other companies, make music for mostly 4 areas: heavy and light industrial, office, and public spaces. The way each song is structured in a list, the timing between the songs, the cycle of 'styles' of songs they use, all are predetermined and devised to react with certain phenomena in music cognition. The music is not to be paid attention to and they design it with that intention. It is supposed to alter your arousal. Most generally, Muzak counteracts the Burris-Meyer Cardinell fatigue curve (slump in activity mid morning and late afternoon) and coincide with the Yerkes-Dodson law. (simple tasks done with music stimulating high arousal and complex tasks done with music stimulating low arousal).

it's not TORTURE, its GENIUS! some of the best music cognition specialists work on this stuff.

[sidoze]

I vaguely recall that Telemann's violin sonatas (or Fantasies?) had that same grating feeling you get as you're just on the verge of nodding off to sleep when some bore from another flat plays his unwelcome music too loud. It sounded brown, and I'm sure the gut strings didn't help. I wouldn't even call it boring. It was just unpleasant.

[Mark]

Something lasting over 19 minutes by Darius Milhaud. Perhaps his Le Boeuf sur le Toit?

[karlhenning]

Something lasting over 19 minutes by Darius Milhaud. Perhaps his Le Boeuf sur le Toit?

Le boeuf runs about 15 minutes and a half;  so if you heard it played for more than 19 minutes, I'll bet it was boring! 

[greg]

http://longplayer.org

Now there's a piece that takes stamina to listen to.

i'm listening to that right now.... actually, i like this type of stuff. But it'd be nice if it could be compacted into 30 minutes or so. I wonder if it really will get to finish on 31st December 2999?

[Mark]

Le boeuf runs about 15 minutes and a half;  so if you heard it played for more than 19 minutes, I'll bet it was boring! 

Yes, Karl, it is that work. I have it on a sampler CD, and it runs for a staggeringly dull 19:56!

[Kullervo]

The most boring music I've heard? Not completely sure, but it was likely something by Elgar 

I find it hard to believe you haven't heard anything more boring than Elgar.

BTW, the Elgar jokes are getting pretty boring too.

[The Emperor]

I actually never heard Elgar 

[Kullervo]

I actually never heard Elgar 

Don't let 71db's irrational fanboydom and the others' dismissal of him turn you off. Try his Enigma Variations, Serenade for Strings, Elegy for Strings, and the Cockaigne overture.

[DetUudslukkelige]

Don't let 71db's irrational fanboydom and the others' dismissal of him turn you off. Try his Enigma Variations, Serenade for Strings, Elegy for Strings, and the Cockaigne overture.

And let's not forget the Cello Concerto. 

[The Emperor]

That elegy i should try, i love elegies, if that one impresses me than i shall try some more!

[Bonehelm]

  Thats how I feel about Mahler. 

  marvin

  PS: its hopeless, with the sole exception of Symphony No.2  I am really having problems enjoying Mahler music. I do not know what else I can do? 

Have you tried the 1st? It's even more charming than the 2nd for Mahler beginners.

[sound67]

Mahler may be overindulgent and narcissistic, but boring he is not.

Bruckner is.

[Kullervo]

Mahler may be overindulgent and narcissistic, but boring he is not.

Bruckner is.

Bruckner is boring... but Tubin isn't?

[Larry Rinkel]

Bruckner is boring... but Tubin isn't?

You question Tommy?

[jurajjak]

[Muzak] is not TORTURE, its GENIUS! some of the best music cognition specialists work on this stuff.

...Some of the worst music cognition specialists also work on it.

[mahlertitan]

Mahler may be overindulgent and narcissistic, but boring he is not.

Bruckner is.

be careful there, what you find boring is pure ecstasy for others...

[marvinbrown]

do you like Bruckner?

To be honest I am not familiar with Bruckner.  My experience with Mahler has left a bitter taste in my mouth (or ears as the case may be) and I lost interest in pursuing other composers "similar" to Mahler, which from what I have read is what Bruckner is all about.  Am I mistaken?  By the way I define boredom as loosing interest in a peice of music- whether that comes from a lack of understanding or a failure to relate (as is my case with Mahler) is irrelevant.   

  marvin

[Larry Rinkel]

To be honest I am not familiar with Bruckner.  My experience with Mahler has left a bitter taste in my mouth (or ears as the case may be) and I lost interest in pursuing other composers "similar" to Mahler, which from what I have read is what Bruckner is all about.  Am I mistaken?  By the way I define boredom as loosing interest in a peice of music- whether that comes from a lack of understanding or a failure to relate (as is my case with Mahler) is irrelevant.   

  marvin

You are mistaken. Mahler and Bruckner have in common the fact that they wrote long symphonies. The similarity ends there. Mahler's sentimentality and irony have nothing in common with Bruckner's deep religious spirit. Their approach to musical form is completely different as well, with Bruckner taking an essentially slow motion approach to musical time that was highly original for symphonic writing. The last three symphonies of Bruckner especially are among the glories of 19th-century music, and don't let anyone tell you otherwise.

[Grazioso]

You are mistaken. Mahler and Bruckner have in common the fact that they wrote long symphonies. The similarity ends there. Mahler's sentimentality and irony have nothing in common with Bruckner's deep religious spirit. Their approach to musical form is completely different as well, with Bruckner taking an essentially slow motion approach to musical time that was highly original for symphonic writing. The last three symphonies of Bruckner especially are among the glories of 19th-century music, and don't let anyone tell you otherwise.

I agree with this wholeheartedly, and it's another reminder to listen for yourself and not rely on solely what you hear from others.